Meet the weirdos —

Margot is 18, a certified menace, and makes more typos than actual words. She’s the oldest of the group, living proof that age and maturity don’t always go hand in hand. She reads, writes a lot of poetry, and roasts everyone unfortunate enough to get on her bad side. Jaxton, Carson, & Gloria have uncovered the deeply buried fact that she’s actually British, though she pretends to live in Oklahoma. The proof? She insists that donut is spelled “doughnut”. Margot is a junior at Logos Online School.

Recent surveys show that the group keeps her around out of a mix of pity and scientific curiosity.

(She accepts apologies in the form of snacks. Everyone in FSW owes her quite a few snacks, though it’s doubtful she’ll ever see them.)

— Bio courtesy of Carson

Favorite food: Sushi/hamburger
Favorite color: 🟢
Favorite music genre(s): Pop/rock/country/folk
Favorite subject(s): Apologetics & poetry
Favorite season: Spring & Summer

Fun Facts:

• State of Residence: Oklahoma

• IQ: Higher than Carson’s

• Things she plans to burn at least once in her life: A chemistry textbook, a page of mathematical proofs, and this🫦 emoji

Personal publication: Fable & Verse

Carson is the embodiment of a busybody, whether that be flying a plane, arguing with Margot, running a blog, hosting multiple podcasts, working on schoolwork (debatable), or talking with the other Weirdos, he really does it all! A self-proclaimed conspiracy theorist, Carson knows a lot about what is unknown. He brings a light-hearted silliness to the group while also keeping them in line. He is a 16-year-old junior at Logos Online School and, though it’s a bit weird, identifies as a slice of bacon. So whenever you’re feeling down or overwhelmed, just remember that Carson is probably flying a plane while writing a blog post about the dangers of podcasting and getting annoyed at Margot who is in the backseat.

— Bio courtesy of Jaxton

Favorite food: Steak/sushi/pizza
Favorite color: 🔵
Favorite music genre(s): Pop and Country
Favorite subject(s): Languages (French and Latin)
Favorite season: Summer & Winter
Movie Genre: Thriller
Book Genre: Mystery/Action

Fun Facts:

• State of Residence: California

• IQ: Higher than Margot’s

• The least weird and goofy one of us all (maybe you can tell by his pic)

Personal publication: The Compass

If dorky and friendly had a child, it’d be our incredibly wild Jaxton. Highly emotional, always energetic, and happily enthusiastic, he’s our 16-year-old assurance that awkward will forever have a home in our chat. Like Carson, Jaxton is a sophomore at Logos Online School and as a result, never ceases to tell Carson to focus while in class. Servant-hearted and sensitive to others, he’s amazing at including people, making sure to constantly subject them to cheesy chicken jokes (why’d it cross the road?).

Jaxton is what he likes to call, “somewhat of a barista.” He enjoys sending pics of his drinks and apologizing for responding late as a reminder that he, unlike us, does in fact have a life. His other specialties include asking questions that make us doubt his sanity (or lack thereof) and announcing that he should be asleep. He loves to shout song lyrics and say “splendiferous” among other unnecessarily long words such as “supercalifragilisticexpialidocious”.

While Carson and Margot are raising the roof with insults they think are amazing and Gloria is agonizing over whether to mediate or take sides, that is when Jaxton is the happiest. He will be leaning back, his feet up on the desk, latte in hand, and with a silly grin on his face; basking in the chaos and cracking some of the lamest jokes known to man.

Oh, and sending cat emojis solely for the purpose of annoying Gloria.

— Bio courtesy of Gloria

Favorite food: Tacos
Favorite color: Turquoise
Favorite music genre(s): Alt-pop and Singer-Songwriter
Favorite subject: Integrated Humanities
Favorite season: Autumn
Favorite movie genre: Thriller
Favorite book genre(s): Action/Adventure

Fun Facts

• State of Residence: Virginia

• Chronic Illness: Type 1 Diabetic

• Has the highest IQ

• Just a chill guy fr

Personal publications: Meditations & Convictions + The Kiwi Kottage

Gloria is our vertically challenged 16-year-old. She loves photography, web dev, and is a whizz at graphic design, (I mean, duhhh, see how sick our publication looks?) Although she is the youngest of the group, Gloria just might be the most mature—experts, however, doubt it. At any rate, she certainly seems to think she is, chasing the other weirdos around the group chat with her cowboy hat and that southern, little, “bless ur hearts.” Like a busy mom, she juggles many responsibilities: A tech support line she created exclusively for Margot’s computer incompetence, the challenge of overlooking Jaxton’s love of cats, and (unsuccessfully) trying to prevent Carson and Margot’s nuclear war.

All too often, however, instead of attempting to mediate the drama, she just sits back and feeds it, encouraging Jaxton’s WILD comments (is the guy ever sober?), Carson’s malicious intent, and Margot’s understandable issue with everything that proceeds from his mouth.

As a weirdo, rule #1 is don’t do what Gloria regards as “cheating on FSW.” What exactly that means is undefined, but that doesn’t prevent Gloria’s impending wrath. If you somehow fall into that accursed category, you will soon find that, while normally a southern sweetheart, she can be the craziest and most menacing of all. And on those days, she is so savage that even Carson apologizes.

Margot loves that.

— Bio courtesy of Margot

Favorite food: Tex-Mex and sushi
Favorite color: ⚫️
Favorite music genre(s): Indie/Alt-pop and CHH
Favorite subject: Math
Favorite season: Summer

Fun Facts

• State of Residence: Texas

• Spatulas broken by accident: at least two, but she’s lost count